Caveat: I haven’t even been able to enjoy tea since I’ve been home from dogsitting and have in fact drank very little. This tea is just ok for me. It’s complex and strange as baijiguan is. Try a baijiguan rock oolong if you never have and want to throw your tastebuds for a little loop.
I debated editing out a portion of my life because it sounds whiney (frankly, I’m scared), but I have friends here so it stays, just moved below.
I tried some big girl panties on for size the past several weeks to push through exhaustion and anxiety. Even big girl panties rip when you’re dragging ass like my cat did across the rug the other day… And all the bits of myself I didn’t want people to see came out in full force last week. Hello, vulnerability. Yes, my cat looks at me with shame when she’s dragging ass, the same look my dog used to give while experiencing the joy of peristalsis over a very sad parcel of sandy soil in a sidewalk that once housed a tree on a steep block in San Francisco until somebody drunkenly parallel parked into the tree. That’s the look I was giving the world last week with my knitted brow. A combination of shame and “Protect me, I’m vulnerable right now”, which quickly morphed into the look of chronic pain — a defocused gaze and disinterested body language that many seem to take as a personal affront. The sweater I knitted wasn’t going over so well at work so I opted to take off the past few days.
What all that whining comes down to is I’ve had a hernia? for several months that I think may be putting pressure on a nerve in my leg which is causing my right hip to crumple beneath me along with that dull, throbbing pain that mutes any pleasurable moments one may have in the midst of SAD season. Makes doing my job difficult and I can’t work out at all. Due to changes in health insurance providers and a period without any insurance, I had put off going to the doctor until last week. I was scheduled for an immediate consultation with the surgeon, which is thankfully today.
Flavors: Camphor, Carrot, Citrusy, Coffee, Compost, Floral, Forest Floor, Freshly Cut Grass, Fruity, Gardenias, Graham Cracker, Mineral, Mushrooms, Osmanthus, Peach, Sugar, Sweet, Tangy, Yeasty